The Importance of Giving Something Up

It has often been said that Humanity has two natures, the willful and the animal, and that these two natures are in constant contest with each other. While we wish that our willful nature would win out all the time the truth is it doesn't. The good news is that our willful nature is like a muscle that can be strengthen and can be made more powerful; its greatest ally is the ability to train our animal nature. 


A large part of being an adult and a good Christian is making the right choices and accepting the responsibilities for our actions but, as in all things worthwhile, the task is far from easy.
During the season of Lent we wonder what is the purpose and the importance of fasting and abstaining. By avoiding small indulgences and peccadillos we train ourselves to discover our control of our animal nature and our natural tendencies to selfishness and harmful behavior. We must always be pushing the boundaries of what we are capable of to achieve the effect of growth; we must exercise our power over temptation. When we do we often feel the same sensations we feel with excerising: reluctance, tiredness and a satisfying soreness/discomfort. 

It is the overcoming of smaller temptations, the sense of achievement however small, that gives us the strength to confront and defeat larger temptations. Abstinence (giving something up) becomes one of the tools we need to subvert our animal nature and to come closer to the willful person that we wish to be and this is the path to happiness. I believe the happiness is reason enough.

On Bachelor Parties

I heard this story and I don't care if it's true. The origin of best man dates back to a time of small villages where there's weren't always enough women to be brides for the men to go around so men would have forcefully acquire women from nearly villages. The best man would accompany the groom on his search and back him up. This conjures up the idea that a man entering marriage does not do it alone but with great support from his close male friends. Today this has grown into the idea of the bachelor party.

What is a bachelor party? What is it's purpose? What are the rules?

The bachelor party is a rite of passage, it marks the end of bachelorhood and the beginning of married life. The purpose is for the bachelor to convince his friends that he is ready for the challenge of marriage and from him to provide a bookend to say, "Here was the last time I was a single man; it is time to put it aside and grow as a person"

For different men and their friends the bachelor party will have different agendas, some may be laid back and uneventful and some may be an all-out, the-world-is-ending hedonistic bash but most are somewhere in between those two extremes. The party is personally customized for the bachelor by the guys closest to him in life who know him the best. The planning usually involves guys from many sides of the marriage prospective: single men, married men and, now more common, divorced men.

The secrecy of the party allows for the participants to interact with the bachelor in an open honest way that won't be judged by outsiders; all reservations must be aired and explored. Of course such things are quite difficult to accomplish sober so alcohol is required. Things such as written accounts of the event, pictures, checks-in or anything else that would make public the sensitive details of the party is very counterproductive to the propose of the whole event. 

Interference from people from outside the group will just foster resentment from the friends of the bachelor and might cause them to doubt support for the marriage. The readiness of the bachelor will be called into question if it seems the decision for him to get married was not his own. His friends will try to protect the bachelor from being strong armed and the damage could be permanent. 

So what seems like a stupid excuse to get together and act like idiots is actually an ancient ritual based on strong interpersonal ties between a man and his friends. What happens that night can have a huge impact on friendship and the strength of the imminent marriage and should not be tampered with.


(P.S. Don't ask any questions about glittered clothing)

Just the Tip

What is a tip? A tip is partial compensation for a service provide with the wages paid to the server being the complement. Now that I have thrown a dry definition out there I can start rambling.

Current rule of thumb is that the tip is a percentage of the price of the food and drink order with a factor of service quality included. What is the connection between the price of goods delivered and the compensation of the related service?

Let's start out with a fresh sheet of paper, let's say we have developed a tipping system from the ground up. What factors to include? Well the two that come to mind right away is the amount of service provided and the quality of the service provided. You can even throw in a term for personality difficulties of people at the table. Since waiting is a physical job why not throw in a term for the weight of the food. Hold out a term for total distance traveled to provide the service?

In truth through, none of those things matter because a tip is not the price paid for services at all. Prices are known up front and the transaction occurs when both parties find the price agreeable. Imagine going to a gas station without knowing the price of gas until after you filled up or as a service example imagine taking a new job and not knowing what the pay would be until after you already worked two weeks.

For the tip to be a true price is must actually have only one factor involved and that's the quality of the service. As a corollary when a bare minimum service provided the tip must be zero.

So after all that, what is the tip really? Well it's a reflection of the quality of the service plus a price shift where the wages of the servers are not 100% paid out of restaurant's revenue.

As for me I never tip below %15 so the way I see it the actually bill has a hidden 15% surcharge for labor and the rest is a reflection of quality (well sometimes , especially at bars, I add some "combat pay"). So what's the implications of all this? I have no idea.

So you're dating a geek...

So you've lost a bet or you drank too much and you ended up dating a geek. Hopefully this guide will help you know what to expect.

First, you know how your VCR (or some other appliance) flashes 12:00 all the time? You will no longer have to worry about that butttttt you will have to worry about converting from Greenwich Mean Time (UTC) to local time in your head.

Second, Video Games, they were there first and they will be there after you leave. It's one of the few ways geeks get emotional satisfaction. Getting between a geek and his video game would be like interrupting one of your ice cream binges. If you want to talk to him or spend time with him, do it before or after the gaming session.

Third, Board Games, don't! One of you may not survive and the relationship is almost guaranteed not to. Relationships should be free from bloodshed and in this case this means no board games (especially not Risk).

Fourth, Geek Arguments, don't pick a side unless you are willing to defend it to the death. Han shot first and never mention Capt. Janeway.

Fifth, Talking, they saying you can tell if a geek is an extrovert if he looks at your shoes when he talks (as opposed to his own). If your geek says, "We need to talk," it's probably because you are still using IE.

Lastly, They are not toys! They are not dolls! And don't take 'em out of the box!

Hail to thee, Mr. C

Who rules the world? It's not the A students, once they get done with their bachelors degree they went back to school for their masters or their PhD's. They will get jobs as professors or some brain on display, a two legged encyclopedia but they don't do much work, sometimes contributing as research scientists. Even worse are those who work for the government in non-defense jobs, they produce things that are a waste of resources and often times harmful.

So I guess when can conclude that it's the hard working B students that rule the world. Nope, it isn't. They are too busy doing all the hard work their bosses dumped on them. They never bothered to figure out how to avoid doing so much work or how to get themselves in charge.

And it's not the D and F students either, it just takes a little more than that.

It's the C students. It's the C students that spend their time doing extra curricular activities to have fun and meet people. It's the C students who got by but didn't get inundated. It's the C students who figure out that getting ahead takes more than just hard work. It's the C students that con the B students into doing the hard work. It's the C students who stroke the egos of the A students to keep them complacent and out of the way. It's the C students who hire the D/F to wash their car or mow their lawn. It's the C students who get elected into politics. It's the C students who know they can't do the job themselves. It's the C students that rule the world.


P.S. We are talking about actually grades here, with all things being level. Those who cheat , hire other people to do the work for them or take simple classes aren't in the grade strata their transcripts indicate.