On Bachelor Parties

I heard this story and I don't care if it's true. The origin of best man dates back to a time of small villages where there's weren't always enough women to be brides for the men to go around so men would have forcefully acquire women from nearly villages. The best man would accompany the groom on his search and back him up. This conjures up the idea that a man entering marriage does not do it alone but with great support from his close male friends. Today this has grown into the idea of the bachelor party.

What is a bachelor party? What is it's purpose? What are the rules?

The bachelor party is a rite of passage, it marks the end of bachelorhood and the beginning of married life. The purpose is for the bachelor to convince his friends that he is ready for the challenge of marriage and from him to provide a bookend to say, "Here was the last time I was a single man; it is time to put it aside and grow as a person"

For different men and their friends the bachelor party will have different agendas, some may be laid back and uneventful and some may be an all-out, the-world-is-ending hedonistic bash but most are somewhere in between those two extremes. The party is personally customized for the bachelor by the guys closest to him in life who know him the best. The planning usually involves guys from many sides of the marriage prospective: single men, married men and, now more common, divorced men.

The secrecy of the party allows for the participants to interact with the bachelor in an open honest way that won't be judged by outsiders; all reservations must be aired and explored. Of course such things are quite difficult to accomplish sober so alcohol is required. Things such as written accounts of the event, pictures, checks-in or anything else that would make public the sensitive details of the party is very counterproductive to the propose of the whole event. 

Interference from people from outside the group will just foster resentment from the friends of the bachelor and might cause them to doubt support for the marriage. The readiness of the bachelor will be called into question if it seems the decision for him to get married was not his own. His friends will try to protect the bachelor from being strong armed and the damage could be permanent. 

So what seems like a stupid excuse to get together and act like idiots is actually an ancient ritual based on strong interpersonal ties between a man and his friends. What happens that night can have a huge impact on friendship and the strength of the imminent marriage and should not be tampered with.


(P.S. Don't ask any questions about glittered clothing)